Just so you know
by Elliewelly1
Summary: Oneshot. Set after finale. Galex. A better ending than the one that they were given on TV. "He stared directly into her eyes, hazel meeting blue, and the world temporarily stopped spinning in that moment." Rated T for Gene's language!


_**Just so you know,**_

_Just so you know, I'm not hurt, Gene._

_No, I'm so much more than that._

_And just so you know, I'm not sad you didn't come too, Gene._

_No, I'm way more than that._

_And just so you know, I'm not waiting for you, Gene._

_No, I'm doing so much more._

_And just so you know, I never wanted you, Gene._

_I needed you._

_**-x-**_

Three words danced in his head. Just three.

_I love you._

Four, now.

_I love you, Bolly._

But he would never be able to say them, would he? She was gone. She always would be. Forever. And he would never be able to tell her. He was too much of a bastard and respected his job too much. He wouldn't be surprised if she hated him. In fact, he expected it. But he would never be able to gain what they might have once had back. She was gone. Forever. Dead. In heaven. Just like the rest of them. They always left.

Always.

_**-x-**_

_Just so you know, I don't cry for you, Gene._

_No, I do so much more._

_And just so you know, I'm not lost without you, Gene._

_No, so much more._

_And just so you know, I don't expect to forget, Gene._

_No, never._

_And just so you know, I'm not holding onto your memory, Gene._

_I'm trying to push the memories away but they wont go._

_**-x-**_

Funny, wasn't it? How life here carried on. How could it just carry on like that? How could people just carry on after they had lost the person they loved? Jesus Christ, he didn't even have any right to mourn her. First off, he was dead himself, too, and that hurt like a punch in the gut. And secondly, he'd never told her, he'd pushed her away like she was nothing. And of course she wasn't nothing to him. He was everything to him. And he was disgusted by his actions. How could he have just pushed her away like that?

Gene hung his head and swirled his glass of whisky before knocking it back. Alcohol provided him a safe sanctuary now, it made him feel numb.

But it didn't make him forget.

_**-x-**_

_Just so you know, I'm not breaking out of heaven for you, Gene._

_No, It's a lot more than that._

_Just so you know, I'm not just breaking the rules, Gene._

_No, I'm sinning for you._

_Just so you know, they aren't just going to let me walk back in, Gene._

_No, do you think they'll let me back in after I've sinned?_

_And just so you know, I never, ever, loved you, Gene._

_No, never. Not so much that it kills me inside._

_No, I never loved you._

_So much more._

_**-x-**_

The doors to CID opened, and the sounds of powerful steps filled the silent air. The sight of her, dressed so brightly as she did, in the middle of the pitch black room, cut through the darkness. Gene just stared as his Bolly made his way over to him. He wasn't at all surprised she was here. Bolly was always doing things her way, always had to make things much more complicated.

She stopped at the doorway to his office, and leant against the doorframe in such a way that she made it sexy. Then again, she made everything bloody sexy.

But she was different. She looked slightly scared, haunted? Her eyes were bruised with dark purple rings, had she been sleeping? Her hazel eyes were betraying no emotion, almost… lifeless. How had she been coping?

"Gene."

"Bolly."

Alex withdrew her three 'Just so you know' notes and walked forwards, just enough to lean over and place them on his desk. Gene stared at her for a moment with raised eyebrows. Alex couldn't help the tinge of disappointment that hit her. Was that it? She really didn't mean anything to him, did she? How could he just sit there so casually, so-so-so him!

Gene picked the notes up. He scanned the first note quickly, his eyes stopped on one word, but then he moved onto the next one. This one he read much more slower, almost afraid of what he was going to read next. The last one seemed to take him an age to read. And then Alex was sure he then read it again. And again. And again.

He dropped the notes to his desk, abandoned his whisky on his desk, and stood, walking around his desk until he was face to face with her. Alex's breath hitched as he took her soft hands in his own rough ones. He stared directly into her eyes, hazel meeting blue, and the world temporarily stopped spinning in that moment.

"I know what yer thinking, Alex." He said sincerely.

"Oh?" She breathed, raising an eyebrow.

"Yer thinking that yer don't mean anything ter me- an' yer bloody well do." He swallowed, "And, just so _you _know Bolly- I do need yer, more than that. I don't try ter forget yer cause it's better that way, more than that. And I don't bloody well love you, either."

They stared at each other in a tense silence for a few seconds.

"More than that." He finally said.

"More than that." She repeated.

Gene dipped his head and caught her lips with his own. Smooth, full and soft… her lips… he almost lost himself as her lips moved perfectly in time with his own. But he couldn't get too caught up in his own happiness, he knew that. They didn't have much time together, they never had. She always had to leave; she was always going 'home', or now, to heaven.

Alex pulled away, staring up at him with tearful hazel eyes and a sad expression.

"Thank you." He whispered.

"What for?"

"Yer came back. Just fer a moment. Put me mind at rest." He told her.

That gained him a smile.

He squeezed her hands softly, "Seriously, Bolls, thanks."

"Gene?"

"Yeah?"

"You will come, one day? Won't you?" Her voice was almost pleading.

He was silent for a few moments, just drinking in her beauty and wondering on how to phrase his answer.

"Even if it takes forever." He finally said.

She smiled, "Memories can keep me going forever, as long as you're there, at the end of forever."

He nodded, "I will be, Bolly. As long as yer still there fer me."

"Always."

"Always." Alex kissed his lips softly, her lips trembling as she fought the tears of… of everything. Sadness, happiness, relief? Of everything, basically.

"Until forever then." She smiled.

He laughed, "See ya around, Bollykecks."

And then Alex turned around and walked out of the doors of CID. Except for this time in their better goodbye, she turned and gave him one last look, a small smile and a wave. Before leaving again, back to heaven.

_**-x-**_

_Oh and just so you know, Gene._

_I will wait forever, in this pub they call heaven._

_I'll always be here for you, Gene._

_Forever._

_I won't break my promise._

_Just so you know._

**A/N: I wanted them to have a better ending; what do you think? **


End file.
